A report from the Grumpy Grammarian

Research (mine) confirms the existence of the Verbal Tic Syndrome (VTS) in one out of every 33 East Enders. It is a chronic condition not unlike a physical tic in that it is “habitual” and “involuntary.” Its symptomology manifests itself in the constant repetition of a word in the victim’s speech. The victim is not aware of his/her repetitions.

My dentist, for example, uses “‘Kay” (an abbreviated “Okay”) in every other sentence. He is not aware of the repetition nor, it is important to note, is he seeking my agreement on the dental work to be done. The use of “Okay?” to confirm agreement will be examined under other linguistic maladies further on in today’s Grumpy Grammarian.

I have a dear friend who also suffers from VTS. She uses the word “basically” with numbing regularity. We might be discussing membership in a local senior organization. “Basically,” she’ll say, “the Island’s newly retired seniors are not  joiners.” Or, should we be talking about programs for that same senior organization, she’ll conclude that, “Basically, the monthly programs are a repeat of what was served up  last year,” or, of the sale of her home, “Basically, the housing market on Shelter Island is depressed.” Okay? Got that?

The etiology in the Verbal Tic Syndrome may be a simple one. Some people don’t listen to themselves, and by extension, don’t listen to you either. Let’s explore the “art of listening” another time. Okay?

Which brings us back to the use of “Okay” to secure agreement. Some teachers, camp counselors and program directors, I’ve noticed, punctuate their announcements with “Okay?”, uttered on a rising inflection. “Let’s review the multiplication tables. Okay?” Or, “Let’s play ‘Park Ranger.’ Okay?” Or, “Let’s stand for the ‘Pledge of Allegiance.’ Okay?”

What if it’s not okay with you? Do you stand up or step outside the group and say, “No! It’s not okay!” Of course you don’t. Your silence is the tacit agreement they’ve been counting on. In case you didn’t notice, I have ended the previous sentence with a preposition — a grammatical lapse, perhaps, but not a linguistic malady.

POSTSCRIPT:

January 19, 2012

Dear Julie Ben-Susan,

Thank you for your reminiscences of those long-time-ago days at St. Agnes Elementary School in Rockville Centre and at the Peter Cooper-Stuyvesant town complex in New York City.

And thank you for declaring your “love of words and grammar.” Let’s drop a verbal pumpkin on those who make you “cringe” with their grammatical lapses.

Fond regards,

Mimi Brennan