Shelter Island students schooled in self-defense

“You’re the only one who can protect yourself.”

The speaker was Michelle Del Giorno of Epic Martial Arts in Sag Harbor, who came to Shelter Island School Monday to prepare young women who will soon leave this small community, headed for college campuses or jobs in a much wider world.

She wasn’t sure how effective the session would be since she’s most accustomed to working with clients who come to her Sag Harbor Epic Martial Arts dojo motivated to learn what she has to teach.

But the students had seen the celebrated 2015 documentary, “The Hunting Ground” about sexual assaults on college campuses and entered the school gymnasium clearly enthusiastic about what they were about to learn.

Board of Education member Kathleen Lynch wanted her daughter, her daughter’s friends and the other members of the senior and junior classes to learn some street smarts that will help prepare them for what the future might bring.

Ms. Lynch, a life coach and massage therapist, noted that in the 1960s, the lesson she and other young women were taught is “don’t resist” and “give him whatever he wants” with the hope that it’s money or jewelry and the perpetrator will go away.

Today’s message is radically different.

“It starts with awareness,” Ms. Del Giorno said.

At a time when studies have revealed 20 percent of female students will be assaulted while at college and 11.5 percent out of a national sample of 4,446 women reported being raped, according to U.S. Department of Justice figures, a passive response is not wise.

“Never give up the fight,” Ms. Del Giorno said. “But seize the opportunity to get away.”

Some of her advice: Scoping out where you are and being aware of escape routes. Know where exits are in buildings. Don’t get into a vehicle with the guy who looks cool, but could turn out to be a perpetrator.

“Trust your instincts,” she said.

Young women need to know that 78 percent of perpetrators are people their victims know. On college campuses, that number escalates to 90 percent, Ms. Del Giorno said, referring to figures gathered by a group of young women who combined forces to tell their own stories and reveal what’s happening at various college campuses for “The Hunting Ground.”

College campuses are among the top five places where assaults against women happen, she said. Other places include gas stations, convenience stores and ATM machines.

Ms. Del Giorno and Emily Nill, a Pierson High School 10th grader who has trained with her, demonstrated some basic moves for the students and had them try various stances and ways of fighting back.

You’re lying or sitting on the beach when a man unknown to you approaches, she told the students. Don’t stay seated, but get up and assume a stance that gives you some leverage should you need it, she advised.

The girls learned how to handle situations in which a perpetrator might try to push or pull them and ways to get into a position where they could swing at a potential attacker.

While Ms. Del Giorno has never been in a situation in which she needed to employ her skills, she credits that, at least in part, to the fact that she carries herself with confidence.

She’ll be back at the school next week showing students ways to topple an attacker who manages to pin them down. And in June, some of the students will join her at the Sag Harbor dojo for more lessons.