Shelter Island Reporter obituary: Raymond Vincent O’Brien

Raymond Vincent O’Brien, 86, passed away peacefully on July 27, 2025, in Ft. Myers, Fla, surrounded by his family.

Born on July 9, 1939, in Brooklyn, New York, Raymond was the son of Raymond T. O’Brien and Adelaide Pogue O’Brien. He grew up in Great Neck, N.Y., where he attended St. Mary’s High School, then moved to Spain with his family and later earning a Bachelor of Science degree from the University of Hartford.

Raymond built a successful career as an entrepreneur and business owner. He worked as a manufacturer’s representative specializing in corporate interior furnishings and architectural products. His professional life reflected his passion for sales and teaching young professionals how to be successful. He earned the respect of colleagues and clients alike throughout his career, later in life he became a mentor wining a state award from SCORE, a national nonprofit with the mission to help small businesses succeed by offering expert guidance and support.

From his years as a child through adulthood, Ray cherished his time and the many friendships he made while on Shelter Island. This is where he met his lifelong friend (Dr.) William “Bill” Lancaster and later met and fell in love with his wife, of nearly 60 years, Heidi Aberli. He had a deep love for golf, fishing, sailing, playing gin rummy, and being with friends — pastimes that brought him joy and camaraderie over the years. 

He was a longtime member and board member of Gardiner’s Bay Country Club, where he was certainly a great competitor and always made sure people around him were having a good time. He would often reminisce about how he adored his time spent at GBCC and the friends he made along the way — friends that would become like family.

Known for his friendly demeanor, he was someone people gravitated toward. Whether sharing a laugh or singing Neil Diamond’s “Sweet Caroline,” Raymond had a way of making others feel comfortable and appreciated.

He is lovingly remembered by his wife Heidi A. O’Brien; son Raymond A. “Rob” O’Brien and daughter-in-law Elizabeth; grandson Michael A. O’Brien; daughter Marlene O. “Marli” Hayes and son-in-law Patrick T. Hayes; granddaughters Emily O. Hayes and Megan A. Hayes; and brother Gerald F. O’Brien.

Raymond was preceded in death by his parents and his sister, Dr. Barbara E. O’Brien.

A man who lived life with kindness, humor, and heart, Raymond said: “I’ve lived my life very nicely; I hope that I am remembered as being kind, funny and caring.” If you were lucky enough to earn a nickname it meant you were extra special. To those who knew him best: Everybody loved Raymond.