A community comes together to remember: Memorial Day 2026

The Shelter Island Memorial Day ceremonies were accompanied by a soggy, unseasonably cool morning of mist and showers.

No matter. The traditions were intact. A good group of Islanders of all ages in rain gear and umbrellas turned out in the Center to remember and honor the Island’s war dead, as well as their countrymen and women across the nation who were killed in action in America’s wars. 

About 20 minutes before the parade stepped off from the Center Firehouse at 10 a.m., the Payano family were hurrying up North Ferry Road — Carlos and Kristen and their two children, Jordan, 8 and Carter, 10 — to meet up with the Little League group who would be marching in the parade. Jordan said she was ready, proudly showing off her Little League T-Shirt. Mr. Payano, who works for North Ferry, said for the 30 years he’s lived on Shelter Island he hasn’t missed the Memorial Day ceremonies. He and Kristin speak to their children about the deeper meaning of the day, he said, of honoring the sacrifices made and “the duty to honor the fallen.”

Stepping in to a North Ferry Road shopfront to get a little relief from the rain were the Salvaterra family, Christian and Ellary and 2-year-old Gerard. From Port Washington, they’ve been to many Memorial Day parades, they said, visiting relatives here.

Gerard was especially looking forward “to the firetrucks,” Ellary said. “He’s in love with fire trucks.” Mr. Salvaterra said it was an important occasion to stop and remember those who lost their lives in service to the country.

Also ducking out of the rain was Islander Jay Damuck, who said he’s at the ceremonies every year. “It’s the least I can do,” he added, to honor the nation’s war dead.

Up at the Firehouse, Chief Maximilian Pelletier was out in front of most of the members of the 65-person all-volunteer force, all in their dress uniforms, preparing to march. The chief has been at every Memorial Day parade since he was 12, marching with the Cub Scouts, and for the last 13 years with the department. Even as a boy, he understood the solemnity of the day, he said, a day of the community coming together to celebrate their freedoms and for those who had died to ensure them. His 4-year-old son Maximilian Jr., was home sick “with that stomach bug that seems to be going around,” cared for by the chief’s fiancée, Jackie Arthur. “But he would have been here.”

The parade started exactly on time, with the traditional march of veterans led by a uniformed color guard. They were followed by members of the Fire Department and the Ladies Auxiliary, scouts, Little Leaguers, the ambulance squad, veterans in vintage automobiles and vintage fire trucks — Gerard Salvaterra was pleased — and the Daughters of the American Revolution. The colored lights of fire department vehicles and ambulances flashed vividly in the wet, gray day.

At Wilson Circle — named for Sgt. James Wilson Jr., the Shelter Islander killed in action in Vietnam — Marine Corps combat veteran and commander of the Island’s American Legion Michael “Zack” Mundy, led the traditional 21-gun salute, and then the ceremonies were moved inside to get out of the rain.

Pastor Steven Adkison of the Presbyterian Church gave the Invocation, praying for those who have died in service, and for peace and “a renewal of love within all of us.”

Sara Mundy, Shelby Mundy and Jessie King then sang a stirring National Anthem, their rich, clear voices soaring through the room. They were followed by Linda Bonaccorso singing an equally beautiful “God Bless America,” with the audience joining her for a rousing rendition.

Ladies Auxiliary member Heather Reylek spoke, telling a compelling tale of remembrance. But before she could start, a smoke detector began beeping; one person said not to worry, the entire Fire department was in the room, drawing laughter from the crowed. To the rescue came Brett Surerus, who climbed atop a bench and poked at the insistent alarm with the tip of an umbrella, which silenced it. As he got down off the bench, applause turned to groans as the alarm started up again. Undaunted, Mr. Surerus climbed back up and this time knocked the alarm off the wall, which did the trick, to even more applause.

Ms. Reylek’s story started, she said, with a phone call last autumn, when someone asked to speak to her husband, Bob. Mr. Reylek took the call and then, “After a good amount of time, Bob came and told me the strangest thing.” The call had come from a woman with the Defense POW/MIA Accounting Agency (DPAA), an organization responsible for research, recovery and identification. They were trying to identify family members of Lloyd C. Albert Jr., Bob’s uncle, whom he’d never met because Lloyd died in service during World War II. Eighty-four years after he was reported missing in action and dead, the DPAA was requesting DNA samples from any living descendants.

Mr. Reylek returned a DNA sample sent by the DPPA. Since then, he has received many documents about his uncle’s military history. “But this was only the start of what could be a lengthy process. It did not necessarily mean that Lloyd’s remains were recovered from the Gulf of Paria in the British West Indies where he perished,” Ms. Reylek said. 

On June 12, 1942, Bob’s maternal grandfather, Lloyd Senior, received a telegram from the War Department: Private First Class Lloyd C. Albert Jr., 99th Bombardment Squadron died in the line of duty of a aircraft accident the 9th of June, 1942, while observing a submarine demonstration in the Gulf of Paria, Trinidad, British West Indies. His body was not recovered. There were two officers and five enlisted men on board. The accident was thoroughly investigated, and his body was deemed unrecoverable. 

“That must have been so hard for the Albert family.” Ms. Reylek said. “No body. No interment. No military honors.” 

She acknowledged it was not just one family that had been devastated; at least 71,762 unrecovered World War II service members are still missing. “Still missing,” she said, “but not forgotten.” 

The U.S. Navy, Ms. Reylek explained, was in the Caribbean to guard against German submarines, that were patrolling those waters and on occasion attacking Allied ships. Lloyd Albert’s aircraft was part of that effort, and an unfortunate air accident sent him and the crew spiraling into the Gulf of Paria. 

“Have the Lloyd’s remains and the aircraft been located? We don’t know,” Ms. Reylek said, her voice growing soft with emotion. “Only time will tell. War is a terrible thing. Our service members swear an oath to defend our nation’s Constitution. They are in turn owed a corresponding guarantee that everything will be done to bring them home. There is no expiration date. It could be 84 years. It could be longer. I have faith that Lloyd C. Albert Jr.’s remains will be recovered, identified, and brought back for much deserved full military honors. He will be never forgotten.”

Air Force veteran Cliff Clark introduced the day’s guest speaker, his son-in-law and one of the most distinguished guests the Legion has hosted, U.S. Army Major General Constantine E. Nicolet.

Nicolet is Special Assistant within the Office of the Under Secretary of War for Intelligence and Security. He previously served as the Acting Director of the Defense Intelligence Agency, leading a 16,500-person joint workforce supporting defense and Intelligence Community leaders worldwide. The general has led units at the platoon, company, battalion, and brigade levels in combat theaters around the globe, including as Commander of the Joint Special Operations Command’s Intelligence Brigade. He has multiple deployments with the 75th Ranger Regiment to Iraq and Afghanistan.

“It is an honor to be with you, “General Nicolet said to the gathering. “Today, whether in small-town squares like this, national cemeteries, or on military bases worldwide, we gather to fulfill a sacred and enduring promise as we stand in the shadow of more than a million American service members who have given their lives since the Revolutionary War.”

He spoke of the Gold Star families across the nation. “For them, every day is Memorial Day,” the general said. “There is an empty chair at their dinner table, a missing voice at family gatherings, and a silent space in their hearts.”

He then remembered three service members who lost their lives in uniform “who lived the values of this country until their final moments.”

1st Lt. Ashley White-Stumpf, he said, was a native of Alliance, Ohio, and, “To those who knew her, she was quiet, selfless, and consistently the hardest worker in the room.” She served alongside Army Rangers and Special Operation forces in Afghanistan in the 75th Ranger Regiment, the same unit that General Nicolet was assigned, as a member of the Cultural Support Teams. 

“Our mission was to conduct nightly raids to capture targeted members of the Taliban,” he said. On the night of Oct. 22, 2011, Lt. White-Stumpf was killed, along with fellow soldiers, by a series of road-side bombs, known as IEDs, or improvised explosive devices.

“Ashley was the first member of the Cultural Support Teams to die in combat, at just 24 years of age,” General Nicolet said. “She left behind a loving husband, Jason, her parents Robert and Deborah White, a twin sister Brittney, and brother Josh. I ask that you help me carry on Ashley’s memory.”

He then asked the gathering to consider the life and death of Army Ranger Staff Sergeant Jay Blessing, a native of Tacoma, Wash., who the general described as determined, talented, and fiercely loyal to his brothers-in-arms. He set the scene of November of 2003 when he along with Sgt. Blessing was assigned in Afghanistan to expand U.S. presence in the northeastern mountains and capture high level Al Qaeda targets.

“Jay Blessing was a member of the ground force and was en route to our location when his vehicle was struck by an IED,” he said. “Jay was killed in action on 14 November 2003, at the age of 23.”

Sgt. Blessing left behind his father, James and his brother, Jason and “members of his unit who were grateful for his service. The Forward Operating Base we established, not far from where Jay was killed, was subsequently named Forward Operating Base Blessing in his honor. I ask that you help me carry on Jay’s memory.”

The general’s final tribute was to Shelter Island’s Army 1st Lieutenant Joseph Theinert. “After the attacks of 9/11, a teenage Joey wrote something incredibly profound,” General Nicolet said. “‘There is nothing glorious about war, but I will go to it to keep the people I love away from it.’”

He told the story many Islanders know, of their native son who was working to disarm an IED in Afganistan, when it was triggered and he shouted a warning, ordering his men to retreat. Because of his selflessness, every soldier under his command survived the blast. Lt. Theinert did not. He was 24 years old.

Here General Nicolet became emotional, his voice wavering a bit. He paused for a moment before regaining his composure. “He is a hero who gave his ‘today’ so his men could have their ‘tomorrow.’ I ask that you help me carry on Joey’s memory.”

Joey left behind his parents Chrys and Frank Kestler and Jim and Cathy Theinert and his brothers Billy and Jimbo.

The general quoted General George S. Patton: “It is foolish and wrong to mourn the men who died. Rather, we should thank God that such men lived.” He concluded by saying, “Ashley, Jay, and Joey. They came from different corners of our country. They served in different roles. But they were bound by a single, unbreakable thread: the quiet, steadfast belief that some things in this world are worth sacrificing for.”

Lengthy applause rocked the room. Islanders separated into small groups, speaking about the speeches and the ceremonies before filing out to the Community Center’s grounds and a large white tent where the Lions Club was providing the annual Memorial Day barbecue.

The weather seemed in accord with the spirit of the day, with the light mist lifting and skies beginning to brighten.

ISLANDERS KILLED IN ACTION 

CIVIL WAR Robert J. Congdon,, Zebulon B. Glover, Randolph C. Griffing, J. Madison Hempstead, Charles H. Haven, Joseph Howard, Hudson Sylvester Nicoll

WORLD WAR I, Henry Martin Mitchell

WORLD WAR II Charles W. Avona, Arthur Dickerson, Robert Winberg, Herbert Howard Power, Carl (Ed) Conrad, John W. Sanwald Jr., Raymond C. Dickerson

KOREA, Julius J. Scholtz

VIETNAM, James Wilson

AFGANISTAN, Joseph J. Theinert