Fighting to build a family: Peter Lighte on adoption, at the Shelter Island Library

On Friday, Sept. 1, Peter Lighte will share the true story, chronicled in his new book, “Straight Through the Labyrinth,” of the struggle to adopt a child.

In this Friday Night Dialogue at the Library at 7 p.m., he will share his experience as a gay Jewish scholar of China turned banker, caught in the crosshairs of the very history and traditions he had studied. It is a story of love, immense struggle to adopt, and perseverance, which leads to the building of a happy family. 

In 1997, Peter, living in Hong Kong, was intent on building a family and wanted to adopt a Chinese baby. He had been the only child of a couple who divorced when he was a boy. He wanted to give family another go — hoping to create a better outcome.  

His problem was timing. He was in the process of adopting a little girl when the handover of Hong Kong to China took place on July 1, 1997. Peter fought for his dream, using the skills he had honed as a banker for 25 years as well as his cultural knowledge, learned though years of study and teaching as a skilled Sinologist.

He prevailed, and adopted an 18-month-old Chinese daughter on Oct. 8, 1997, likely becoming Hong Kong’s first gay father.

Within two years, Peter and his partner Julian  adopted another daughter, but not without digging in and dealing with the same bureaucracy they had experienced in the first adoption process. He has been convinced, he says, that purposeful synchronicity can thrash anything in the way of love.

Please register for this presentation online at silibrary.org or call 631-749-0042.

Also, please join in song for Tennessee Walt’s The Hank Williams Century on Friday Sept. 22 at 7 p.m.