Island profile: Bouchra Drame and the road from Morocco to Shelter Island

Bouchra Drame grew up in Northern Morocco in a family of five, in a large house with her aunts, uncles and their families. Everyone cooked together, but her mother — the oldest of her siblings — was the chef of the house.

“Everything was made from scratch, the preserved lemons, rolling semolina flour to make the couscous,” Bouchra said. “When I was 10, my mother had me sit on the floor to learn, so she could watch me.”

Last summer, Bouchra began expressing the love of food and cooking she learned as a child in pop-up Moroccan and Caribbean dinners at the Dering Harbor Inn. On Saturday, July 3, the latest of her dinners will be served buffet-style, and will feature two distinctive Moroccan techniques, méchoui, a kind of slow grilling, and tajine, a method of cooking in an earthenware pot.

The story of how Bouchra Drame came to Shelter Island from Morocco is a tale of care and love. She was working as a nurse in Casablanca, taking care of a woman from Mali who was seriously ill. Impressed with the tender care Bouchra showed, the woman’s daughter asked Bouchra if she was married. Bouchra’s patient added, “I have a son who is not married.” 

Her son was Moussa Drame, a tennis pro who lived in Mali, 2,000 miles away. When he called his mother, she insisted that Bouchra take the phone. It was the first time Bouchra would speak with her future husband and the conversation took place in French, since Bouchra didn’t speak the Bambara, the language of Mali.

“He said he wanted to thank me for taking such good care of his mother,” said Bouchra. “She was in pain, but she had such a beautiful smile, and she never complained.”  

Moussa and Bouchra stayed in touch by phone, even after his mother left the care facility.  Her future sister-in-law Bafanta’s parting words were, “Please stay in touch. I want you to marry my brother.” 

When Bafanta gave Bouchra a phone to make it easier for her to call her brother, her aunt advised her, “Bouchra, these people are very serious,” a fact proven when Bafanta arrived at Bouchra’s home to speak to her father and mother who agreed to the match, provided Bouchra said it was what she wanted.

After that, Bouchra and Moussa exchanged pictures, and spoke by phone two or three times a day for two years. “I could see he was a man who would take care of his wife, a very kind man, and respectful.” Finally Moussa came to Morocco in 2007, where they met in person for the first time, and married a few weeks later.

In 2008, Moussa and Bouchra moved to New York where their first child Bintu was born, named for Moussa’s mother, who had brought them together and passed away not long after. “My mother-in-law’s name means joy and happiness,” said Bouchra. “I never thought I would marry someone from another country or go to the U.S.”

Their next child was Aicha, who is now 10, and then Mouhamad, who will soon be 7.

In New York, Moussa coached tennis, and ran a restaurant in Harlem with his sister, Bafanta, who had also moved to New York. It was called South Beach Café, and it specialized in the West African and Caribbean styles of cooking that Bafanta knew.

Bouchra was 27, quickly learning English alongside her toddler while watching Barney & Friends. As soon as her English was good enough, and her kids old enough, she started helping out at the restaurant. “My sister-in-law ran it. She cooked amazing food from West Africa, Mali, the spices!” After the restaurant closed, she began teaching French in a private, bilingual early education program called Petite Poussin Too, and still teaches there.  When Moussa coached tennis on Shelter Island, Bouchra stayed in the city with the children, joining him for weekends in the summer. Last year, during the pandemic, she spent much more time in Shelter Island when schools in the city closed for in-person learning. “It was May to October,” she said. “I met so many beautiful people. I got to explore too.”

But with all of her family in Morocco, the pandemic was a difficult time too. “We were planning to go, but I’m afraid if we go we will be stuck there,” she said “Morocco did very well. The vaccine, the lock down, they obeyed the rules, they don’t play there.” 

One of the many attractions of Shelter Island is the well-equipped restaurant kitchen at the Dering Harbor Inn, where the family lives during the summer. “My kids say, ‘Mommy is always in the kitchen.’ It’s big and I have everything I need. I love cooking and baking there.”

She started last summer making smoothies and juices, and added Moroccan empanadas, a slightly sweet and savory pastry as well as Moroccan cookies and other sweets such as Moroccan baklava, made with peanuts or almonds and rolled into a log instead of cut into squares.

“A lot of people have never had Moroccan food. Tagine and couscous, that’s the first thing you think of when you eat Moroccan food,” she said. “I’m so happy when people come and say they want more.”

The buffet-style barbecue dinner that Bouchra is cooking on Saturday, July 3 will include lamb kebabs, chicken kababs, tajines, whole fish, couscous with onions, and lots of olives.

“I am a grateful woman,” she said. “To be here, and to be able to make people’s stomachs happy.”

Bouchra Drame’s Moroccan Cuisine at The Dering Harbor Inn: Saturday, July 3, 6:30 – 8:30 p.m., Call: 631-749-0160, Email: [email protected]

Lightning Round

What do you always have with you? I always have my small Koran.

Favorite place on Shelter Island? Dering Harbor.

Favorite place not on Shelter Island? Sitting on a cushion at a hotel, looking out at the Sahara. 

When was the last time you were elated? When my kids say something funny.

What exasperates you? If I’m talking to someone and they don’t listen.

When was the last time you were afraid? I was afraid during the pandemic, especially for my son, because he has asthma. 

Favorite movie or book? Moroccan, Arabic movies.

Favorite food? Sardines.

Favorite person, living or dead?  My mom.